I Thought I Had Dementia. Turns Out It Was Perimenopause.

(a brain fog memoir from inside the hormonal fog machine)

Not to brag, but I once had a fully functioning memory. I could actually finish sentences.

I know. Pretty cool, right?

But not anymore! These days, I walk into rooms and just...stand there. Not in a whimsical, dreamy Disney princess way. In a "did I come in here for a pen or because I forgot I own a dog?" way.

Brain fog isn’t just forgetting your PIN at the checkout (though, yes, I have tapped my Opal card at Harris Farm before). It’s a full-blown identity crisis. I used to be articulate, efficient, maybe even mildly inspiring in a meeting. Now I’m one mispronounced word away from quoting my nanna’s scone recipe during a team brainstorm.

The worst part? I know I used to have thoughts. Smart ones. Big ones!

Now, I’m just trying to remember what day it is and whether I’ve moisturised one or both shins.

I've become the kind of person who can no longer follow a plot twist.

Like…I had to rewind “Legally Blonde” the other night. LEGALLY BLONDE.

And I often find myself staring at my dinner, mouth slightly open, holding a fork like I've forgotten what I'm eating (spoiler: it was reheated sun-dried tomato pasta and deep existential dread.)

Meetings are my personal Mount Everest.

I used to lead strategy sessions. Now I just sit there, nodding thoughtfully while my brain plays the Macarena on loop and quietly panics that I’ll be asked a question.

If you’ve ever blanked mid-sentence and considered just pretending you lost signal, congratulations, you may be perimenopausal.

Let's talk solutions, because that's what functioning adults do (allegedly):

I’ve discovered one thing that helps: MCT oil.

Yes, Medium Chain Triglycerides - or as I like to call them, Mental Clarity Time! (MC Hammer's lesser known song 😉)

MCT's are healthy fats found in coconut oil that your brain can actually use as fuel. Not like that peppermint mocha you convinced yourself was "medicinal".

Here’s how I sneak them in:

• Stir a teaspoon into my coffee and pretend I’m Gwyneth Paltrow (minus the jade egg drama)
• Blend into a smoothie with half a banana, almond milk, protein powder, and hope
• Drizzle over roasted veg so my dinner screams “I’m amazing” even when I’m Googling “why do I cry at Coles ads?”

And it helps! Not in a “I’ve written a novel before 9am” self-esteem-boosting kind of way, but in a “I found my keys and remembered my partner's name” kind of way. Which honestly? Feels like a win!

I'm not losing it. I'm just...perimenopausal.

There’s a difference. I haven’t lost my brain, it’s just doing that thing where it hides behind the couch cushions like the TV remote.

And if this sounds familiar? It’s not because you’re broken.

It’s because your body’s changing and you need support, not self-blame (aaaaaand maybe fewer meetings at 4pm because they're the worst).

What I'm doing now:

• I’m working with my brain instead of gaslighting it
• I’m embracing healthy fats, balancing my blood sugar, and doing my best not to burn down my life every time I forget why I opened the fridge

Perimenopause is different for everyone.

For me, it’s word salad, eczema on my elbows, thinning hair, and spontaneous crying in the shower. For you, it might be rage-texting your colleague then immediately deleting Slack.

So let’s figure it out, yeah?

I’ve got a framework. You’ve got a foggy frontal lobe. Together, we can do this.

Your key takeaways:

• Brain fog is real, annoying, and not a moral failure
• Healthy fats like MCT oil = your new brain fuel and BFF
• You’re not “losing it”, you’re in a hormone transition
  
• Pyjamas are an appropriate outfit at all times. Seriously, they are